


Tender Heart

by havok2cat



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Brief mention of depression, Caretaker Castiel (Supernatural), Chronic Pain, Gentle Dom Castiel (Supernatural), Headaches & Migraines, Light Bondage, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Mechanic Dean Winchester, Porn with Feelings, Praise Kink, Professor Castiel (Supernatural), Strangers to Lovers, Sub Dean, Vomiting mentioned, car accident mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-05
Updated: 2020-01-14
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:08:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21686563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/havok2cat/pseuds/havok2cat
Summary: After a serious car accident ten years ago, Dean is left with chronic pain and a string of doms that refuse to work with his physical limitations. He's resigned himself to a kink free, single life until he runs into Castiel at a local club. They are instantly smitten with each other and Castiel works hard to show Dean what it feels like to be cherished and spoiled.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 34
Kudos: 434





	1. Chapter 1

Dean pulled into the parking lot of the club, his car engine rumbling, windows down and Robert Plant crooning softly from the stereo. It was late and ‘Quips and Chains’ was busier than he had expected of a Wednesday night. He parked in the last spot, as far from the neon lit door as possible and watched people come and go with rising trepidation.   
Dean leaned his head back and sighed. It had been ten years since he frequented a kink club, since Dean had done anything kink related with another person. 

The accident had changed his whole damn life. Instead of working on classic, model cars, fixing them up for discerning clients, Dean was teaching at the local community college, watching barely legal kids clang around busted up engines. Hell, lately those same kids taught him more about fancy car tech than he taught them about engine repair. But it was a steady job, one that allowed him to ease off from being too physical, what with his teaching assistants and teacher’s pets desperate to get an ‘A’. He was good at delegating the heavy lifting and his Uncle Bobby ran the program, so....

Dean knew he was lucky, he had the job that paid decent. He had Sammy, his wife, Eileen, and Bobby for support. They stuck by him after that pickup t-boned him, late one Saturday night, ten fucking years ago. The driver hadn’t even been drunk, just couldn’t take his damn eyes away from his phone long enough to see the intersection light had turned red. His family had held his hand, had his back even when he screamed and cursed at them, angry at the world and angry at himself for feeling so low, so sad, so hurt. 

It could have been worse, he could have died but that was a cold comfort through his stint in the hospital, floating on morphine and enduring more than one spinal surgery. And the months of physical therapy had thrown him into a deep depression, drowning under the hopeless feeling of ‘what if the pain never got better?’. But the worst part had been losing his on and off boyfriend, his Dom, Arthur. 

Their relationship had never been smooth, they had been barely thirty, together for most of the four years they had known each other and Arthur had a real fear of commitment. But Arthur was a good Dom, always made Dean feel comfortable and safe when they scened. Dean always got what he wanted and he thought Arthur did too. After the accident, well, Arthur made it clear that he never planned on staying with Dean forever, so why not just leave now. You know, before he had to get his hands dirty and deal with Dean’s messy ‘feelings’. Dickhead. 

It took six long years before Dean clawed his way out of the black miasma that filled his waking life, until he felt anything close to emotionally stable. Six years of getting accustomed to constant, fluctuating, debilitating at times neck and shoulder pain, horrible migraines and sleepless nights. He always, even now, walked on the precipice of pain med addiction, balancing his meds just right and fighting the desire to abuse those numbing white pills. 

Most days, Dean got by on over the counter meds and muscle relaxers. He did yoga, stayed up on his physical therapy exercises and didn’t lift more than ten pounds on his left side. Even being careful with his body, Dean still faced problems, excruciating migraines and insomnia. Some days were good and some days were bad but he had his family. So, lucky. 

The only area of his old life that Dean had never recovered was his love life. Over the years he had tried, albeit half heartedly, to get back in the kink scene. He’d been on a few dates, had a few nights of perfectly lovely, non kinky sex but the spark hadn’t been there. He couldn’t help but think about what he really wanted, what he really craved. So those dates were one night only and he had turned to going to clubs again. 

The clubs offered their own problems for Dean. A forty year old Sub wasn’t much in demand from his experience. Most nights, the clubs were crawling with young men and women that Dean couldn’t compete with or felt uncomfortable submitting to. All the Doms his own age were looking for a sweet young thing and Dean was so far from that it was laughable. He was jaded, stubborn and worst of all to some, tall and muscular. So he hadn’t gotten very far at clubs. 

Online was different. So many different people, a myriad of ages and kinks could easily connect and Dean’s luck had been much improved. With age, he hadn’t lost his good looks, even if his body was a bit rounder, too hurt to do much cardio, too much beer and too many bacon cheeseburgers. His profile pulled a lot of Doms and when they got to talking, being honest with his physical limitations had dwindled his options greatly. Dean loved bondage, loved being tied up and held down but he had to be careful with his body and he had to trust his Dom to be careful too. So far, no one had earned his trust but he was willing to wait. The thought of having a Dom again kept him going, patient in this like he was in nothing else. 

Which brought him here, to ‘Quips and Chains’, to meet a potential lover, Garth. In the three days he and Dean had been talking, they had never broached anything sexual past their hard limits and preferences and Garth had been extremely understanding about Dean’s chronic pain. He asked questions and Dean suspected from those questions that Garth had done a bit of research. Mostly, they talked on the phone to each other about mundane shit, how their day went and what they were eating for dinner. The guy seemed a little goofy, a lot dorky but sometimes when they spoke on the phone, he pulled out his Dom voice and it never failed to give Dean goosebumps. Dean was hopeful that their meeting tonight would go well and he’d wake up with the lanky nerd in his bed, sore in all the right places. 

Dean glanced at his watch. Damn, no more time to sit in his car and be nervous. He stepped out of his car, closing the door gently and nervously straightened his grey henley under his faded leather jacket. He glanced down, making sure the rolled up cuffs of his jeans weren’t wonky and ran a hand through his hair. He looked good, he knew he looked but damn, all Dean wanted was to turn around, go back home. Back home to his empty house, his bare cupboards and lonely bed...Fuck, nevermind. At worst, the night promised an hour at the club watching beautiful people mingle, sipping a beer and at best, a night not tossing and turning alone in his bed, staring at his ceiling in quiet despair. 

***

An hour later and two beers down, Dean wasn’t feeling so optimistic. Garth was a no call, no show and Dean hoped the squirrely little fucker showed up late so he could wring his damn neck. He sighed, slammed his empty beer down on the bar and unlocked his phone for the hundredth time, reloading the app to check for a message from Garth. The last one still said how excited the punk was to meet him and that he’d be wearing his best flannel shirt. Dean wanted to be more upset but at this point, being stood up seemed about right. 

Sam was always on his ass about breathing exercises and impulse control, do more yoga, eat more salad, yada, yada so instead of sending a long line of curse words to Garth, Dean texted a simple, ‘you ok?’.

Another five minutes of staring at the phone and Dean clicked it off, closing his eyes and rubbing his neck gently, his color coded wristband that declared him a ‘sub open to play’ scraped harshly against his skin. He could feel a migraine coming and sitting here, working himself up was not going to help things. The uncomfortable stool wasn’t helping his posture any, his neck was damn stiff under his probing fingers. The bartender offered another beer but Dean waved her off, requesting a water instead, which he sipped while looking around the club again. 

It was a nice place, cleaner than what he was used to. The guy who ran it, Gabriel something or other, definitely had money and spared no expense to make his patrons comfortable. The decor was tasteful too, high ceiling, lots of dark green and brown. Homey, made a person want to relax, enjoy themselves. There was a stage for demonstrations to Dean’s left but it was empty and most of the other patrons were keeping their activities a soft ‘R’ at the moment. Dean had never been to a kink club that was so laid back. He just wished he could enjoy it more. 

The migraine wasn’t getting any better. In fact, Dean could feel the turning of his stomach that warned of impending upset and he lurched to his feet, steadying his trembling body on the edge of the bar, trying desperately to shove down a sudden dizzy spell. He cursed under his breath and stumbled forward, following the signs to the bathroom that wavered in his vision. 

At the end of a dim corridor, the sign to the bathroom beckoned Dean forward like a siren and he kept his hand on the wall in case the dizziness returned. He reached for the door, putting all his weight into the action to swing the large slab of wood inward but it opened before he could make contact. A figure filled the doorway and Dean’s hands met the guy’s chest and the momentum carried Dean forward, pushing him over. The guy went down like a bag of bricks, letting out an undignified yelp and Dean froze above him, horrified and embarrassed, nausea temporarily forgotten.

The man let out a deep growl, sitting up from his sprawl, looking like an offended puppy and glared at Dean so hard that he was surprised he didn’t burst into flames. The guy looked pissed and Dean stumbled over his words, reaching a shaking hand down to offer to help him up. 

“Fuck, man. I’m so sorry. I swear that wasn’t on purpose.”

The guy opened his mouth, looking ready to verbally flay Dean but he paused when he caught sight of the wristband on Dean’s outstretched arm. His expression changed instantly, looking a little shocked then apologetic and then his blue eyes surveyed Dean head to toe with a blatant calculation. He stood up on his own, brushing dust off his rumpled button down shirt and pulling the legs of his suit pants down. Dean felt like an idiot, standing there blocking the guy’s way, hand still out, ogling his ass as he turned and bent over to pick up his phone from the tiled floor. 

Just as he started to lower his arm, the guy turned around and slid his hand, soft, long fingered, hot palm, into Dean’s, squeezing gently and running a finger along Dean’s wrist, under the band. He couldn’t help but stare at the ‘dom ready to play’ wristband the guy had, shivering and feeling the finger on his wrist like a hot brand. 

“Don’t worry, I believe it was an honest accident. No harm done, Mr…”

The guy smiled, a little crooked, bright blue eyes crinkling at the edges and Dean was struck silent at how beautiful the man was, letting his deep, gravelly voice melt into his ears and light up his damn brain. Fuck, fuck. How deep could that voice go? What would the man say if Dean sank to his knees right here, right now? Dean shook his head, opening his mouth to respond when his stomach turned again. He snapped his mouth closed and tightened his grip, pulling the guy forward and out of the door before rushing in. 

He collapsed onto the floor in front of the nearest toilet before throwing up, thankful when he heard the door bang shut. He did not need Hot Dom seeing this. What felt like hours later and two dry heaves, Dean sat back and reached into his pocket, pulling out a tiny pill case. He opened it and shook out a couple, looking at the sink that seemed miles away, feeling too weak to move. 

Of course, the door opened and Hot Dom came in and Dean slumped forward in defeat, pressing his head against the stall wall, trying hard not to think about how gross it was to sit on a public bathroom floor. He came over to crouch in front of Dean, looking concerned before eyeing the pills in his hand with slight distrust. He spoke, reaching a hand out as if to touch Dean’s back but he hesitated, hovering. Dean still felt the phantom heat and pressure, shivering at the thought of this gorgeous man touching him. 

“Are you here with someone? My brother owns this place, I can call him and he'll page them. They can come help you...Or I can help you?”

Dean’s throat felt scratchy and his mouth was bitter, the taste of bile making him want to heave more. 

“Water…”

Hot Dom lifted his other hand, holding out a water bottle for Dean to take. Dean lifted an eyebrow as he took it, twisting it open and taking the pills in his hands, then pressing the cold bottle against his forehead. The guy still looked suspicious of the pills he was taking.

“Don’t worry, man. I have a prescription for migraines. It’s got my name on the label and everything.” 

Hot Dom looked a little guilty and a lot relieved. Dean looked at the guy from under his lashes, lengthening his neck to press more of the condensation from the bottle over his skin. They guy’s eyes darkened as he followed the path Dean made, droplets of water dropping down and under his shirt collar. 

“Where’d you pull this from?”

The guy blinked, focusing on Dean’s eyes. 

“I heard you expel your stomach contents through the door and obtained the water for you at the bar.” 

Dean paused. 

“Oh, uh thank you, really. That’s real nice of you…?”

Hot Dom smiled warmly at him, extending his hand again. 

“Castiel, nice to meet you.”

Dean took his hand, biting his lip, feeling suddenly shy. Castiel’s unwavering attention was a little overwhelming while he sat there, sweaty and shaking, tasting bile, neck hurting even worse after the effort it took to puke. 

“Again, is there anyone you want me to contact?” 

Dean dropped Castiel’s hand and leaned his head forward to rest on the wall again, letting out a sigh that was half pained sob. He reached up to massage his neck, feeling pathetic for tearing up. Tonight sucked. 

“No...I was supposed to meet someone here, he...didn't want me, I guess.”

Dean brought his hand up to cover his face, shoulders shaking from suppressed sobs. Jesus fuck. Why was he falling apart in front of a stranger? This guy didn’t want to deal with his crap. Dean felt so vulnerable, in pain, fucking pathetic. His voice was strangled and weak but he forced out a soft, 

“I’m sorry.” 

Castiel made a soft shushing noise, adjusting from a crouch to sitting on his knees and leaned closer to Dean.

“It’s okay, sweetheart. You’re okay.”

Dean’s breath hitched and he couldn’t suppress the shudder that went through him at hearing the pet name fall from Castiel’s lips. Castiel-he couldn’t help but shorten it to Cas in his mind- hummed, sounding delighted. 

“You like it when I call you that?”

Dean nodded, still hiding his face in his hands, battling with the desire to sink into the floor and disappear or run away. 

“Look at me.”

It was a command, Cas’ voice low and firm and Dean obeyed eagerly. He couldn’t remember the last time someone used that tone of voice with him and his muscles were already loosening, slightly easing the knots in his neck that radiated a throbbing pain. His nausea was easing, the handful of pills he took starting to kick in. Cas rewarded his obedience with a lovely smile. 

“Good, that’s so good, sweetheart.” 

Dean whined, eyes tearing up again at the warmth that spread through his chest to hear Cas praise him. That was all he wanted, really, was to be good for someone. 

“What is your name?”

“I-It’s Dean, Sir.”

His own voice broke the spell Cas had cast over him and Dean looked down, feeling insecure. Why was Cas doing this? Pity? That had to be the reason. 

“Dean, look at me.”

He was helpless to resist, didn’t want to fucking resist anymore. Wasn’t that why he was here, to let go? This beautiful dom would never want a broken sub like Dean but maybe for a few minutes, Dean could feel what it was like to belong to Cas. 

“Good boy, Dean. I know you don’t feel well and I’m proud of you for listening. It's okay for you to nod or shake your head when I’m speaking to you but always respond. Can you do that?”

Dean nodded, watching Cas’ lips move as he spoke, watching them tilt into that soft smile that accompanied the words, ‘good boy’. He wished he didn’t feel like shit warmed over so that he could enjoy this more. He hadn’t felt like this in years, maybe never. Cas was being so gentle with him, unlike any dom he had ever met. 

“So we have established you are not here with anyone-” 

Dean whined, closing his eyes tight. It was his fault that nobody wanted him-

“Dean.”

Cas’ voice was like a whip, snapping Dean out of his spiral. He opened his eyes again. 

“ It's okay, sweetheart. You have been so good for me. I can only assume whatever asshole dom that didn't show up tonight is an idiot. You are being perfect, Dean.”

Cas sounded so soothing yet firm that, in that moment, Dean believed him. Dean responded, voice a hoarse whisper. 

“Thank you, Sir.”

Cas nodded and hovered his hand again over Dean’s back. 

“Can I touch you, Dean? I want to comfort you with soft caresses, nothing sexual. Do you want that?”

Dean wanted that desperately. 

“Yes, please, Sir. Please, touch me.”

Cas shushed him again, lowering his hand to run his fingers through Dean’s hair, dragging his nails gently across his scalp. Dean moaned at the sensation, slumping forward to rest his head on Cas’ shoulder. The scent of laundry detergent, day old cologne and skin made Dean press closer, chasing the scent. He imagined reaching up and moving Cas’ collar to the side, pressing open mouthed kisses against the skin underneath, running his tongue over every inch he could reach. But he stayed still, he didn’t know if Cas would even want that and he wanted to be good. 

Cas dropped his hand to Dean’s nape, softly squeezing and massaging the tight muscles there. Dean gasped, pressing closer, practically climbing into Cas’ lap. It felt so good and Dean moaned again, louder and more freely as Cas slowly increased the pressure of his hand until Dean flinched. He eased off the force of the massage but didn’t stop and Dean melted again. 

“Does that feel good, sweetheart?”

“Y-yes, thank you, Sir.”

He felt Cas draw in a shaky breath and Cas kept his free hand on the small of Dean’s back as he shifted, stretching his long legs in front of him and leaning against the wall. He guided Dean to sit in his lap, legs straddling Cas’ hips. Dean let out a sob and curled around Cas, making his body as small as possible, tucking his head under Cas’ chin, chasing the other man’s warmth. He was taller than Cas, more muscular but he felt protected, safe. Cas accepted the new position easily, making low, soothing noises, running his hand up and down Dean’s back. 

Dean let his mind drift in a pleasant haze for a few moments, not sure if he imagined the brief press of Cas’ lips to his hair. He felt better, neck muscles much more relaxed and his pills were definitely kicking in, easing the pounding pain in his head. He felt warm, floaty, breathing deeply of Cas’ addictive scent. He only blinked back to awareness at the feeling of Cas shifting. He leaned back, pressing into the hand still on the back of his neck, in time to catch a wince on Cas’ face. Dean made an inquiring noise and Cas gave him a wry smile. 

“I’m fine, Dean. It’s just tough for an old man to sit on the floor this long.”

Dean huffed and rolled his eyes then sat up further, wincing at the pull of muscles in his back. 

“Okay, yeah. I feel you.”

He shifted his hips as he stretched his back and froze, realizing with dawning horror that he was rock hard, sitting in Cas’ lap, pressing his erection into Cas’ stomach. He flushed and rose to his knees, still bracketing in Cas’ hips. He was ready to leap up, run out the goddamn door but Cas’ hands flew to his hips, keeping him still. Dean could feel his fingers digging into his flesh through the jeans. 

“It’s okay, Dean. I think you went down while I was massaging your neck.”

Dean bit his hip, feeling even worse. He was sure that Cas was regretting this encounter more and more. He wrapped his own fingers around Cas’ wrists, trying in vain to pry his hold open. 

“Oh, fuck. I’m sorry, I-” 

“Dean, stop.”

Dean froze, staring at Cas’ chin, wide eyed, fingers going slack. Cas raised his hand, curling his forefinger and thumb around Dean’s chin, tilting his face up until Dean met his gaze. 

“You are safe, Dean. You are doing so well for me and...you are not the only one affected by our current intimacy, I assure you.”

Dean’s eyes darted down without thought to Cas’ lap and he could see the large outline of a half hardened cock under his slacks, pushing against the zipper. Dean’s mouth flooded with saliva and the only real thing keeping him from begging Cas to let him get his mouth on that cock was the acidic tang that still lingered. Not sexy.   
He glanced back up to Cas to see that wry smile and ducked his head, grinning a bit. Cas dropped the hand on Dean’s chin back down to his hip and tugged. Dean followed willingly, sitting back down flush on his lap, settling his hands on Cas’ shoulders. 

“Do you feel a bit better?”

Dean nodded, mesmerized by the flash of white teeth behind Cas’ full lips as he spoke. His arousal was a low, soft buzz through his body, comforting as opposed to urgent. He had never felt like this before. 

“Did you have a migraine? You get those often?”

Dean nodded again, tongue feeling glued to the roof of his mouth. It felt good to be nonverbal, to just exist and not have to interact past the basic body movements. No one had let him just exist before. 

“That is what I thought. Your muscles were really tight. I’m glad I could help you, Dean.”

“Me too, Sir.”

Cas hummed and pulled Dean down a bit to kiss his forehead. The warm press of his lips on Dean’s skin startled him and he took a sharp breath. Cas leaned back to look at him, his eyes dark and possessive. 

“I love the way you call me ‘Sir’, baby.”

Dean blinked for a moment, looking at Cas, feeling like he'd been punched in the gut, shocked and delighted at his words. Cas looked so earnest, so happy and pleased that Dean believed him. He bit his lip and placed his hands flat on Cas’ chest, ducking his head to give Cas his best sultry look from under his long lashes. He tilted his head to show off the long line of his neck, trying his fucking best to impress this sweet as sugar, hot as hell dom. 

“I’m glad...Sir. I really like calling you that.”

Cas makes a sound more akin to a growl, a softer one than he made when Dean knocked him down earlier. It rumbled through his chest and up Dean’s arms, settling into his bones. He wanted this man so much that Dean felt like he was on fire, hot and panting under Cas’ gaze, writhing in his lap. Cas’ hands were still on his hips, keeping Dean from pressing their hard cocks together and Dean whined. Cas cleared his throat, getting Dean’s attention. 

“I’m going to ask you something, Dean and I want you to be honest with me. Do not just say what you think I want to hear. What you want is the most important thing in the world to me, do you understand?”

Those words made him shiver, made him feel so fucking special. 

“Yes, Sir.”

Cas smiled and ran his hands up and down Dean’s arms, slow and comforting, making Dean relax before he could even contemplate getting nervous. 

“Good boy. I want to make sure you get home safe, you have had a tough night. I would like to be the one to take you home, Dean. Especially because you dropped a little for me. Do you want that? I would never, ever be mad if you said ‘no’ to me. I can call anyone you want to come get you but you are not leaving here alone.”

Dean didn’t even need to think about it. He’d kill to get Cas to come home with him and fuck Garth for not showing. Cas was here, taking care of him, looking at him like he was something precious. There was no debating what he wanted but there was still a little voice of doubt in the back of his head. 

“What’s wrong, sweetheart?” 

Fuck, he would never tire of hearing that. 

“Why are you doing this, being so nice to me, taking care of me? You don’t even know me.” 

Cas tilted his head, squinting at Dean. Dean wanted to kiss the furrow between his eyes. His voice when he answered was matter of fact with no hint of embarrassment.

“I wanted you as soon as I saw you, Dean.”

Dean snorted.

“When I pushed you down and puked everywhere?”

Cas shook his head, smirking. 

“No, at the bar. I saw you sitting there, looking nervous, sipping a cheap beer. You looked ready to run and I couldn’t keep my eyes off of you.”

“Why didn’t you come talk to me?”

Cas gave a self deprecating wince. 

“I didn’t think, I mean, I thought you were looking for-”

Dean felt a flash of disappointment. 

“You thought I was a dom?”

Cas frowned, squinting again, looking like a confused puppy. 

“No, Dean. Why would you say that? Anyone who looks at you and can’t see how wonderful you are and how good you could be for the right person is an idiot.”

Dean blushed, clutching at Cas’ shirt, wrinkling it. 

“Then why didn’t you come over? I wouldn’t have turned you away. In fact, it would have done my ego some good after getting stood up.” 

Cas drew in a deep breath and took Dean’s hands in his. 

“I was going to but I was nervous.”

Cas paused to gather his thoughts and Dean made an encouraging noise, closing his hands tighter around Cas'. 

“Most subs I try to be with grow bored with me. I’ve been told I’m too...soft, not rough enough for them. I feel uncomfortable being too rough. It hurts me.”

Dean let out a hum, brushing a soft kiss on Cas’ knuckles. 

“You’re what? A gentle dom?”

Cas’ smile was self conscious. 

“I suppose you could call it that. I prefer to take care of my subs, spoil them but discipline them when necessary. I can be flexible for the right person, with the right scene but I’ve had subs try to push me too far. It took one too many dom drops to get me to seek someone more compatible.”

He gave Dean an intense look and Dean smiled, feeling warm and special. 

“Well, let me tell you, Cas, I’m not into pain or too many bruises. I just want to be good for someone, be praised for...anything, really. This is the safest I’ve ever felt with anyone. It’s so...nice. Real nice, Cas.” 

Cas raised an eyebrow, looking amused. 

“Cas?”

Dean ducked his head, not realizing he had said that out loud. He started to apologize but Cas cut him off.

“I like it. No one ever calls me that. That can be just for us.”

Dean pressed his face into Cas’ shoulder again, smiling against his neck, feeling warm and happy. Cas wrapped his arms around Dean, enveloping him, setting his head on top of Dean’s. 

“This is crazy, Cas. I feel like I’ve known you forever.” 

“I know what you mean. As soon as I saw you, I felt drawn to you and I was determined to speak to you. I was in here to practice what I was going to say.” 

That startled a laugh from Dean and he leaned back, feeling endeared to see Cas blushing and pouting. 

“Why are you laughing at me?”

“Nothing, I just didn’t expect a dom to be…” 

Dean trailed off, realizing that any way he finished that sentence would seem disrespectful. Cas raised an eyebrow, looking unimpressed and stern. 

“What? Insecure, flawed, human?”

Dean stuttered before looking down, ashamed. 

“I’m sorry, Cas. I didn’t mean it like that.”

Cas smiled again and ran his hands through Dean’s hair, making Dean practically purr and push into his hands like a cat. The touch seemed to settle them both. 

“I know and I forgive you. It’s hard to undo societal conditioning, especially when it comes to stereotypes but we must learn and change. I may derive pleasure from your submission but I am as insecure as the next person, as insecure as you can be.”

Dean nodded, grinning. 

“Anyone ever tell you that you talk like a professor?” 

Cas’ eyes sparkled with mirth. 

“I am a professor, Dean. I have a PhD in Environmental Science and I’m tenured at the university.” 

Dean shivered, eyes falling to half mast, imagining Cas working late in his office, grading papers with Dean between his knees, keeping his cock warm, feeling safe and taken care of, making his dom feel good. Dean was half hard again and he watched in fascination as Cas’ pupils blew wide as if he could read Dean’s thoughts. 

“You like that, baby? Do you have some fantasies you want to tell me about? I would love to hear them, Dean. I want to make them all come true.”

Dean was panting, cock twitching at the promising growl in Cas’ tone and he wanted nothing more than to lean forward and kiss him. But the hard tile floor biting into his shins and the stiffness of his neck returning reminded him of where they were. 

“I’d love to continue this conversation, Sir but more than that, I want you to take me home, please.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little longer than I anticipated.

Dean flat out refused to leave his Baby at the club and Cas argued so adamantly that Dean shouldn’t be driving with his migraine that Cas ended up driving. The thought of someone else having the keys to his car made him uncomfortable but as he watched Cas slide into the driver’s seat, Dean had to admit that he looked damn sexy behind the wheel. Cas noticed his gaze and gave him a cocky smile and a killer wink and Dean huffed out a laugh. The bastard knew he looked good. 

Cas reached over and casually set his right hand on Dean’s thigh, his thumb caressing the inseam of his jeans. Dean fumbled the phone in his hand before shooting Cas a half hearted glare and finished punching in his address. He was too tired and sore to pay attention to giving directions. He set the phone between them and settled back in the passenger seat, leaning his head back and letting out a sigh. 

“How are you feeling, sweetheart?”

Dean’s breath caught and he squeezed his eyes closed tighter. It never failed to catch him off guard when Cas called him that. Not many people used pet names for him, maybe out of respect or neglect. But to hear Cas’ whiskey rough voice rumble out ‘sweetheart’ and ‘baby’, well, it set his heart to racing. Not that he’d ever admit that out loud. Ever.

Dean smiled, lifting his head up and opened his eyes to look at Cas’ profile, watching for a moment as the streetlights passed over his handsome features before leaving behind darkness. Light. Dark. Light. Dark. Damn, Dean could get lost looking at Cas. He laid his palm over Cas’ hand on his thigh, a barely there touch. This was okay, right? Cas had reached out first.

Dean still felt adrift about the turn his night had taken. He was halfway convinced he was dreaming, that he’d wake up in the morning having never met Cas, having made him up in a migraine induced hallucination. The only thing that kept him from breaking down after the highs and lows of the day was Cas’ hand on his thigh, the pressure grounding and reassuring,

“I’m good, Cas. Better now that it’s more quiet. Head still aches a bit, neck stiff but it’s always like that.”

Cas chanced a look at him, his features open and polite, not pushing and Dean relaxed, thankful. He hated it when people pried into his health history, acting entitled to know his trauma for no damn reason. Cas kept his eyes on the road, patient. He’d never met someone like Cas, so nice and kind. He made him feel so safe and Dean had never trusted someone so fast in his life. It was a little scary, a little exciting. Dean cleared his throat. 

“Car accident, long time ago. Not really in the mood to talk about it but it was a long road to recovery.”

“I understand, Dean. I’m glad to help, though.” 

Dean hummed and looked forward, eyes unfocused as he watched the lines on the road blur by. Help, right. Why was Cas helping him home? Pity? Attraction? Both? 

Was Cas going to take him home, drop him off at the door, call an Uber and leave? God, that would be so humiliating. Here Dean was, practically drooling over how amazing Cas was and maybe Cas was just doing a pathetic stranger a favor. 

But...Cas had said he wanted to approach Dean at the bar, talk him up and take him home. He’d been in the bathroom practicing. Dean cracked a smile, wishing he’d been a fly on that wall. Adorable. 

Dean shook his head, banishing his self deprecating thoughts. It didn’t matter why Cas was taking him home, Dean was gonna try damn hard to get him to stay for breakfast.   
He was so deep in his head, that it took a moment extended silence for Dean to realize that the car was off and they were sitting in his driveway. Cas was staring. It should have been creepy, the intensity in his eyes but Dean bloomed under it. He didn’t think he could look away for anything. 

Cas’ hand was still on his thigh and Dean felt his fingers tighten, digging into the soft flesh. It sent a thrill through Dean’s body, straight to his groin and Dean let out a startled gasp, throwing his head back against the seat and sliding down an inch, spreading his legs more. 

His eyes were drooping, limbs heavy and Dean blinked over at Cas, cursing silently. He had barely slept the night before, too nervous and the muscle relaxer he took at the club was finally kicking in, mixing with his beer and trying to lull him to sleep. 

Despite his exhaustion, a low thrum of arousal was pulsing in his body, aided by Cas’ unwavering scrutiny and the brush of his thumb on the crease of Dean’s leg and hip. He felt good though, barely any pain in his back but he was ready to keel over at any second. Unless Cas was into that, Dean was sure he didn’t present a very pretty picture, falling asleep before they could get to the more fun activities. 

Cas didn’t look upset or annoyed, he looked soft and fondly amused in the yellow light shining from the porch and into the car. He leaned closer and raised his hand from his thigh, running it through Dean’s hair. It was Dean’s number one weakness and he melted into the action, pressing into the pressure and groaning. Cas smiled at his reaction and this close, Dean could clearly see more than one color of blue in his iris. When Dean just stared, Cas’ face fell into a concerned expression. 

“You look a little out of it, Dean.”

“Yeah, yeah, sorry. My meds are kicking in, they make me tired but my migraine is gone. Feel a little spacey but your touch is helping me keep grounded.”

Cas’ face cleared and his hand dropped from Dean’s hair to his nape. His hand was big and warm, wrapping around the back of Dean’s neck and squeezing. Dean moaned and pressed his face into Cas’ shoulder, closing his eyes tight and breathing in his scent. The trench coat under his cheek was cold and a little stiff but it smelled like Cas’ cologne and Dean wanted to be nowhere else in the world but Cas’ arms. His spoke, his words slurred. 

“Jesus, Cas. Feels good.”

Dean felt Cas press a soft kiss against his hair before he pulled back, exiting the car and walking around to Dean’s side. He opened the passenger door and reached in, laying his hand back on Dean’s nape. He helped Dean stumble upright and guided him to the front door. Cas supported him up to it, taking most of Dean’s weight without difficulty. 

Dean wondered, as he clung to Cas, how strong the man actually was. Could he manhandle Dean a little, press him into walls and throw him on the bed? 

Fuck. Dean clung tighter as Cas unlocked the door, suddenly, irrationally concerned that Cas would prop him up in the entryway and leave. He was so drained from the migraine and so tired from the pills that he couldn’t keep hold of his tongue. 

“You’ll stay, right Cas? Take care of me? Please, Sir.”

Vaguely, Dean was horrified but instead of laughing or teasing him, Cas shushed him, pulling him closer, arms like a vise around his waist. He felt too needy but the thought of   
Cas leaving him alone right now was too much. 

“Of course I’ll stay, baby. I wouldn’t leave you alone like this. Let me take care of you. I’ll make you feel so good, I promise.”

Dean turned in the entryway, pushing Cas against the closed front door, hands desperately grasping his lapels. Their bodies were pressed close, chest to chest. Dean could feel the other man’s every breath and he wanted so bad to kiss him but his mouth felt dry, full of cotton and tasted sour.

“Fuck, Cas. I want to kiss you so bad but I really need to brush my damn teeth.”

Cas laughed, eyes crinkling at the edges, and the sound he made was more like a giggle. It set off Dean and they leaned against each other, still in their coats, laughing until Cas dragged Dean through the house, following his weak, giggling directions to the bathroom. He felt so light, like he could soar through the roof, into the sky and touch the damn stars. 

Cas had to prop him up from behind in the bathroom, chest to back, his arms wrapped around Dean’s waist, watching with bright, content eyes as Dean brushed his teeth and swished with mouthwash. It was so damn domestic that it made Dean’s heart ache and he wasted no time in turning in Cas’ tight embrace to kiss his soft lips. The kiss tasted like toothpaste and something sweet, a little smokey. 

The hot, slick slide of Cas’ tongue on his, the electric feel of their lips pressing soft and slow made Dean even more dizzy and his knees gave out. Cas grunted, stepping back to catch himself on the wall with a huff and Dean leaned on him, laughing. Cas smiled sweetly, pressing a kiss to his forehead. 

“Mmm, you taste like whiskey.” 

Cas chuckled, a low, rumbling sound that reverberated through Dean’s chest and all the way to his damn toes. 

“You have a refined palate, Dean. I had a bourbon at the club. I am impressed.”

Dean hummed, leaning forward to whisper against Cas’ lips, feeling like he was floating outside of his body.

“I’d like another taste, Sir.”

Cas raised one hand, keeping his other arm around Dean’s waist like a vise and palmed the back of Dean’s head, rubbing gently, making Dean whine and melt in his arms. Dean pressed into the hand, raising his head, offering his lips to Cas like a flower to the sun. Damn, he felt so good, so safe in Cas’ arms. No one had ever…

Cas crossed the minuscule space between them and pressed their lips together. Dean stayed limp, going where Cas wanted him to, letting him explore Dean’s mouth with his tongue. It felt so good to let go, to be gently guided and held close in strong arms. He was hard again but it was a distant feeling, a full body arousal and he pressed his cock to Cas’ thigh. 

The pressure made him gasp, feeling Cas’ hard, straining thigh against him. He wanted to ride that thigh, feel Cas’ firm hands guiding him into position. That thought made him press harder and he chased the delicious friction, falling deeper into the kiss until he was stopped with a sudden, bruising grip on his hips. 

Cas broke the kiss, panting, face flushed and leaned his head on the wall with a solid thud. Dean whined again and tried to chase those lips but the hands on his hips kept him still. Instead of feeling frustrated, Dean felt warm all over, pushing forward just to feel Cas’ grip tighten. Fuck, he wanted those hands everywhere, holding him down. 

“Dean, we need to stop for now.”

Dean sighed, feeling forlorn and pressed his face into Cas’ shoulder. 

“No, no, please, Cas, don’t leave-”

Cas shushed him and wrapped both arms tight around his waist and shoulders. Dean clutched at his coat, trying to crawl under the man’s skin. 

“You’re okay, baby. I promise I am not going anywhere.”

He kissed the top of Dean’s head before gently forcing him back. Dean met his eyes reluctantly. He wanted to stay hidden in Cas’ arms forever. 

“I want to kiss you longer, sweetheart. I want to spread you out on that big bed of yours and take you apart until you can’t think of anything but me. I want to see you soft and yielding under me, so fucked out that you can’t move, eyes hazy, moaning my name, begging me, Dean. Fuck, I bet you beg so pretty.”

Dean moaned, easily imagining all the things that Cas wanted. He wanted them too, so badly. 

“Yes, yes, please, Sir. I’ll be so good for you, I promise. Just give me a chance.” 

“Shh, I know, Dean. You will have your chance to please me...in the morning. When you are rested and feeling better.”

“But-”

“Dean, do you trust me?”

Dean was nodding before he even processed the question. Maybe it was stupid or too quick but Dean felt like he could trust Cas with everything, anything. Cas smiled, looking so soft and happy. Dean felt like he would do anything Cas wanted to keep that look on his face. He wanted so bad for Cas to always look that happy. 

Now that the possibility of orgasms were off the table, Dean felt more exhausted than ever. He let Cas help him into the bed, a warm glow in his chest as Cas removed his socks, shoes, jeans and jacket, leaving him in his shirt and briefs. 

Cas didn’t pause to leer at him or give him any kind of heated attention, just helped Dean move until he was under the fluffy duvet and tucked him in gently, with reverence. No one had ever treated him like this, like he was cherished, special. 

Dean sank into his bed, relaxing and drifting until Cas rose from the edge, standing over him and smoothing back the hair from Dean’s head. It looked like he was about to move away, leave the room and Dean pulled back the covers, reached out, grabbed a fistful of Cas’ coat and pulled. 

The collar tugged at Cas and he let out a harsh choking sound before falling down into the bed next to Dean. He pressed soft, lilting apologies into Cas’ neck as he kissed a line from the underside of his jaw to his clavicle. Cas melted into the bed with a resigned sigh, wrapping an arm around Dean as he snuggled into his side, laying his head on Cas’ chest, closing his eyes. 

“Stay with me, Cas. Keep them away, Sir.”

“Keep what away, sweetheart?”

Dean felt even more distant from reality and he was unsure if his response left his mouth before he drifted off to sleep. 

“The nightmares…”

With Cas’ arm so tight around him, his scent surrounding Dean, the darkness didn’t seem so frightening. 

*** 

He dreamed of Cas. His lips on Dean’s, his mouth around Dean’s cock, Dean kneeling, bound and eager, ready to please…

Waking up was like rising from under water, a soft, soothing ascent out of the darkness accompanied by soft toned murmurs and a hand in his hair. Dean was warm, mind fuzzy, muscles lax and rock hard. The confusing in between state of sleeping to awareness removed his inhibitions and he moved his hips, chasing satisfying pressure and giving sleepy little moans. 

It took entirely too long for Dean to realize he was humping Cas’ thigh, his leg thrown over that same thigh to keep him pinned to the bed. Dean froze his movements, eyes flying to Cas’ face to see him wide awake and staring. His eyes were dark, half of his face cast in shadows by the low glowing lamp, pupils blown wide and he was panting lightly. He tried to pull back but Cas stopped him, reaching over with his free arm to hold him close, Dean’s front to Cas’ side. 

“Shit, Cas. I’m so sorry…”

Dean braced himself for recriminations but Cas looked mesmerized. 

“You looked like you were having a good dream, baby. Do you want to tell me about it?”

His voice was the lowest Dean had heard yet, rough and jagged from sleep and arousal and Dean let out a whine, canting his hip again, trying to rut. Cas moved fast, flipping   
Dean onto his back and moving on top of him, covering Dean and sliding that thigh between Dean’s legs. The heavy weight of Cas on top of him was a relief and Dean relaxed into the bed, hands fisted in Cas’ trench coat. 

“You slept in your coat?”

Cas smirked and raised an eyebrow.

“You did not give me a chance to remove it, Dean. You slept so soundly and deeply.”

Dean blushed, remembering vividly dragging Cas into the bed and attaching to him like an octopus. He gave Cas a look from under his lashes, feeling suddenly shy. 

“M’sorry. I’ve never slept so good, Sir.”

Cas leaned down and started pressing soft kisses on Dean’s face. 

“That makes me happy to hear, baby. Morning is still a few hours off. How do you feel?”

“Good, better...I want you.”

Dean tilted his head back, offering his throat to Cas and he took the invitation, biting and licking down one side and up the other. Dean was panting, desperately trying to move   
his hips against Cas but the weight on him was immovable. 

Cas took the hands grasping his coat and pressed them into the bed by the wrists, one hand in each of his. As much as Dean wanted to be good for Cas, the angle the restraint caused was painful, twisting his shoulders back and hurting his neck. He gasped and struggled. Cas pulled back, letting go of Dean as if scalded and rose to his knees. The sudden loss of Cas’ comforting weight was disorienting and he reached for him, whining low. 

“Dean, are you hurt?” 

Cas’ hands hovered over Dean as if he wanted to touch, soothe but he was waiting for permission. Dean sighed and rubbed at his shoulder until it relaxed then sat up, keeping Cas between his thighs. He touched Cas’ chest gently, glancing down briefly to take in the tent in his pants with a rush of heated pleasure. 

“I’m fine, Cas. Honest.”

Cas shook his head, face grim. 

“We should have discussed your limitations before I took control.”

Cas looked down, looking so angry at himself that Dean smiled. No one had ever been so concerned about his comfort, in or out of bed. He shook his head, looking Cas right in the eye. 

“Look, it’s not that easy. I’m not even sure of my limitations. It’s been...damn, ten years since anyone wanted to dominate me in bed, Cas. It’s gonna be something we work out together. If you’re comfortable with that?” 

Cas placed a hand over Dean’s where it rested on Cas’ chest, pressing his palm harder over his heart. He met Dean’s eyes with a fierce, determined glare. 

“I am, Dean. I would be honored to dominate you.”

Dean laughed, scooting closer to him and running his hand over every inch of Cas’ body he could reach, lifting up the bottom of his shirt to caress the hot skin revealed. Cas shivered under the attention. 

“Okay, well, we just figured out that my arms can’t go behind my back. So that leaves…”

Dean drew his hands back and pressed his wrists together, hands fisted in front of his chest, grinning up at Cas. A rush of air left Cas at the sight and he bit his lip, weighing Dean for a moment with a calculating gaze. Dean stayed still, patiently waiting and was rewarding when Cas’ lips quirked into a seductive smirk. 

Dean swallowed at the sight, a little nervous to see the change in Cas from bumbling and apologetic to self-assured and predatory. He looked like he was ready to pounce on Dean, eat him up and it sent his heart beating double time, pulse fluttering. It was his turn to be breathless. 

Cas leaned forward to give Dean a chaste kiss and then he stood, moving to the end of the bed, smoothing out his coat, his eyes never leaving Dean. He studied Dean for a moment longer before he spoke, voice firm, tone a gentle but unbreakable command. 

“Come here, Dean. Take off your shirt and kneel on the edge of the bed and then put your hands like that again for me.”

Dean didn’t hesitate before crawling forward on hands and knees to the end of the bed. The only thing in his mind was Cas’ voice and the commanding look in his dark eyes. He didn’t care that he was only in his briefs and Cas was fully dressed. There was no time to be self conscious when Cas was waiting for him, expecting him to obey. 

He knelt at the end of the bed, Cas close enough to touch and held his wrists up again, body buzzing, already feeling his mind calm to a soothing silence. He didn’t have to think as long as Cas was here to take care of him. Even his own pleasure, the overwhelming need to touch his hard, aching cock was secondary to what Cas wanted. 

“Good, sweetheart. So good for me. Stay there.”

Dean smiled at Cas, content to stay still. He was comfortable here, no hard floor hurting his shins, praise wrapping around him like a warm blanket. Cas pat at the pockets of his coat before he hummed, reaching his fingers into one and pulling out a short length of blue fabric. With a jolt, Dean recognized it as a tie and he groaned as Cas wrapped it around the knuckles of his left hand, squeezing that hand into a tight fist. 

Dean bit his lip, body trembling and could feel the phantom touch of that silken tie around his wrists, binding him, body and soul to Cas’ will. 

“I have some rules for you, Dean. I know you can follow them for me. I know you can be good for me. Are you ready to listen?”

Dean snapped his eyes up to meet Cas’, nodding. 

“Yes, Sir.” 

Cas smiled, eyes soft. He shrugged off his trench coat, reaching behind him to hang it on the back of the bedroom door, before reaching for his belt. Dean watched with greedy eyes as he unbuckled it, pulling it roughly from the pant loops before folding it in half. 

“Good, sweetheart. So eager for me. For now, we are going to use the stoplight system. Do you know what that is?”

Dean nodded, breath shaky, eyes still caught by the sight of the leather belt in Cas’ hands. Cas tilted his head and then suddenly pulled the belt taut, making a sharp, jarring ‘thwack’ that made Dean give a wet gasp and lurch his hips forward. He was trembling harder now, every nerve in his body on fire, cock painfully neglected. 

“You like my belt, Dean? What do you want me to do with it?”

“I-I want you to spank me, Sir. With the belt.”

Cas chuckled. 

“You like to be spanked, Dean? I’ll remember that for later. I won’t use the belt, though. I prefer using my hands.”

Dean whimpered. 

“Yes, Sir. Anything to have your hands on me. I’ll do anything.”

It was easy to imagine Cas laying him over his knees, bare ass in the air and the firm, sharp smacks that his hand would create. He was so wound tight, he felt ready to unravel.   
His thoughts were wispy, too intangible to catch and all he wanted was for Cas to take a step forward and touch him, anywhere. It must have showed on his face because Cas reached out, face warm and hummed thoughtfully, cupping Dean’s cheek gently. Dean pressed into the touch, feeling starved and desperate. 

“Good boy, sweet boy. Tell me about the stoplight system, Dean. Use your words.”

“Green for keep going, yellow for slow down and red for stop immediately, Sir.”

Cas smiled again, that gentle, patient smile that Dean was quickly becoming addicted to and kissed him, running his tongue delicately across Dean’s lips. Dean opened under the soft caress, parting his lips and drinking in Cas’ taste, his careful touches. They had barely begun but already Dean knew that no one else could make him feel like this.   
He was so lost in the kiss that he didn’t realize Cas had unwound the tie from his fist and was wrapping it around Dean’s wrists until Cas was knotting it. He pulled his hands apart, testing the restraint and thrilled at the soft rasp of the material. It held tight and Dean felt like he was ready to float out of his body. 

The lamp was eclipsed behind Cas, creating a soft, yellow halo around him and Dean was too mesmerized to look away. He was beautiful, steady as a rock and here for Dean, to take care of Dean. The last little piece of Dean’s resistance floated away. He was caught, held safe, protected. 

“Lay back, baby. Head on the pillow, legs spread wide for me.”

Dean obeyed, sinking into the plush mattress, resting his bound hands on his chest, spreading his legs as wide as he could. Cas hummed and followed, kneeling between his thighs. He was still fully dressed, pants sagging without the belt, showing one crease of his hipbone and the top three buttons undone on his shirt, giving Dean a tantalizing view. His hair was a sight, rakishly messy but it only served as a comfort, making Cas seem more human, softer, kinder. 

“You look beautiful, Dean. What is your color?”

Dean took a deep breath. 

“Green, Sir.”

Cas began running his hands over Dean’s body, soft palms cupping and caressing every inch of skin he could reach. Dean squirmed under the attention, every nerve on fire and gasped when Cas leaned down to press open mouthed kisses on his straining thighs. Every move he made pulled on the tie binding his wrists. The feeling of it constricting his movements was another comfort, reminding him constantly that, in this precious moment, he belonged to Cas. 

Dean jumped when he felt the soft rasp of teeth on his thigh and he moaned, trying to push closer to the feeling. Cas chuckled and bit harder, not enough to bruise, just enough to sting. 

“Yes, yes, Sir, please, please.”

Dean felt wild, panting and begging for things he couldn’t name. 

“Yes, sweetheart. I was right, you sound so good, begging me. But-”

As Dean writhed under the praise, Cas’ pinned his hips, leaning forward to catch Dean’s eyes with a stern, tight lipped expression. His face, more than his hands, stopped Dean dead, breath catching in his throat, eyes wide. Cas’ expression eased a little, the left corner of his mouth raising in a smirk. 

“But, you need to be good and stay still, Dean. I’m going to put my mouth on you and you are going to tell me why you woke up so hard and desperate. Was my baby dreaming something naughty?”

Dean shivered at the possession in Cas’ words and nodded, responding hoarsely as Cas dipped his head to place soft, light kisses on Dean’s balls and shaft through his underwear. 

“Yes, Sir. I-I was dreaming of you. I was, ah, bound for you.”

Cas hummed, keeping eye contact as he licked the path of his previous kisses to the tip of Dean’s cock and tongued at the slit. Dean moaned loudly, squeezing Cas’ broad shoulders with his thighs and throwing his head back, biting his lip. Cas slipped his hands under Dean, palming his ass and pulled Dean down an inch, into a better position. 

The causal strength made Dean’s cock twitch and Cas chuckled, squeezing his hands and kneading the flesh of Dean’s ass before letting go. He brought his hands up and dug his nails into Dean’s thighs, making him jump and look down again. Cas slowly removed Dean’s briefs, gazing reverently at every inch revealed. He kissed the crescent moon indents he left behind and spread Dean’s legs wide again. 

“Remember to stay still, sweetheart. Next time I might have to tie your legs down.”

Dean huffed but obeyed, drawing his knees up before laying them wide, unashamed. 

“Don’t threaten me with a good time, Cas.”

Cas smiled and growled playfully.

“Cheeky. What happened to my good little submissive?” 

He rose up to kiss Dean, using more teeth than tongue, making Dean’s head spin, leaving him gasping for breath at the end of it. He rolled his body up, desperate to make contact but Cas was too far away. Dean gave a high whine. 

“I’m here, Sir. Always right here.” 

“Yes, you are. So pretty, so good for me, Dean.”

Dean shivered and went lax, body thrumming as Cas kissed and licked his way down Dean’s chest, hands running gently up and down his thighs and hips. In the next instant, Cas’ hot mouth was on Dean’s cock, lips like a vice around the head and tongue rolling over the slit before dipping lower to press at the most sensitive parts of Dean. 

“God, Cas, Sir, fuck, please.”

Dean kept up a stream of insensible murmurs, twisting his bound wrists together and trying hard not to thrust into Cas’ mouth as he sank lower, taking more and more of Dean. The hot, wet slide, teeth scraping gently, tongue rolling expertly sent Dean higher than ever, mind floating in a soft grey cloud of hormones, nerves lighting up under Cas’ hands and mouth. 

Cas hummed, the vibration making Dean’s eyes roll back and placed a hand on Dean’s clenching abdomen, palm down, long fingers spread, applying enough pressure for Dean to feel it, for Dean to stay grounded in the moment. 

Dean was thankful, as much as he wanted to float away from his body, entrust all of himself to Cas, there was another part that wanted to stay here in this moment, to savor each caress and touch and remember their first time forever. 

Determined to do so, Dean looked down, watching Cas move on his cock, lips stretched obscenely, eyes dark and hooded as he gazed at Dean. Cas moved the hand not pressing on Dean’s stomach to cup his balls, kneading lightly. The wet sounds his mouth on Dean’s cock filled the room, driving his pleasure higher, balls drawing tight. 

“I’m close, Sir. I’m so close.”

Cas hummed again, looking pleased and raised the hand from Dean’s balls to his face, tapping his fore and middle finger against his lips. Dean moaned and opened wide, sucking the two fingers into his mouth and rolled his tongue against the pads. He let the saliva pool in his mouth and Cas pressed down on his tongue drawing a surprised “Ah!” from him. Dean dropped his jaw open and let Cas explore with his fingers, surrendering to the probing. 

After a few moments, Cas took his fingers back, gleaming wetly and Dean watched them disappear under him before he jumped and groaned to feel them caressing his rim. Cas didn’t press in, just moved over his hole, working his cock faster with his mouth, eyes shining with such fierce determination that Dean couldn’t hold back. He thrashed under Cas, head thrown back at the overload of sensation and came. 

Cas took him deep, swallowing around the head of Dean’s cock, thumb pushing firmly against his perineum. Distantly, Dean knew he was being loud, babbling Cas’ name and throwing out disjointed curses but he didn’t give a shit. His body was a live wire and the only thing keeping him grounded was Cas’ hands, running over every inch of him as he murmured praises against his skin after each soft kiss. 

Dean came back to himself slowly, the blinding white behind his eyelids receding as he focused on Cas’ hoarse voice and warm hands. He blinked up at Cas, kneeling over him, still between Dean’s spread legs, feeling dazed and limp with lingering pleasure, mind coming online. Cas smiled, his face soft and glowing, eyes bright and reached down to pop the button on his slacks, pulling the zipper down before reaching inside.

“What is your color, sweetheart?”

Dean laughed and licked his lips, unable to look away from Cas’ hands.

“I’m so fucking green, Cas. You have no idea.” 

The sight of Cas’ cock, fucking finally, made Dean moan loudly. It was big, longer than his own, hard as steel and an angry red. It twitched in Cas’ hand as he gripped it tight, running his palm over the leaking head before fisting down, once, twice. Cas’ eyes didn’t leave Dean as he fucked into his own fist, eyes flickering from Dean’s face to his bound hands to his spent cock. 

“I knew it, Dean. You look so good like this and you are mine, all mine.”

“Yes, fuck, Cas. I want you to come on me, please, Sir. Mark me.”

Cas’ hips slammed forward as he fucked faster, breath fast and shaky. 

“Dean, baby. My sweetheart. You look so good, all fucked out, so soft and happy.”

He came quick, hunching over Dean, growling and marking his stomach. Cas rubbed his come into Dean’s skin, pausing briefly to offer his fingers to Dean. Dean licked them clean enthusiastically, enjoying the way Cas groaned at the sight and bit his lip. He welcomed Cas’ kiss, languid and slow, soaking in the afterglow and feeling warm under Cas’ possessive gaze.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next is after care with mandatory bubble bath!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm...so...soft

They kissed for a long time and Dean basked in Cas’ soft, loving attention. Cas was still touching him, moving his big, warm hands over every inch of Dean, as if he couldn’t believe that Dean was real, that they were here together. Dean had never felt more cherished and the amazed look on Cas’ face really boosted his shriveled ego. Had anyone ever looked at him like this, like he someone precious? Fuck, if Cas didn’t stop being so damn nice he was gonna start blubbering all over him. 

The moment was broken by Cas reaching to undo the tie around Dean’s wrists and Dean made a sound like he was getting gutted. He felt so vulnerable, so distant and the thought of not having the grounding feeling of the soft silk around his wrists was terrifying. Cas shushed him, smiling softly, face open and understanding. 

“Everything is okay, sweetheart. You are being so good for me. Let me take this off and I’ll hold you with my hands. I want to hold you. I’ll never let go.”

Cas’ voice was heavy with a deep promise and Dean shivered. He never wanted Cas to let go. He nodded, blinking his tears away and offered his wrists to him. Cas gave him an encouraging smile and kissed each wrist over the silk, nuzzling and nipping at the skin around the material. Dean sighed and relaxed, sinking into the bed and squeezing his raised thighs, trapping Cas between his legs. 

Cas chuckled and winked at him before slowly working the knot loose. Before Dean could register the loss of the restraint, Cas’ hands replaced it, fingers winding tight and holding him close. He kissed his way from wrist to each knuckle, his plush lips caressing his skin and his warm breath dancing over Dean’s sensitive nerves. 

“You are so beautiful, Dean. So handsome and strong, kind and perfect. Perfect for me, baby. I am never letting you go.” 

Cas kept murmuring soft praises as he pushed Dean’s hands into the bed next to their hips, pressing firmly and closing his fingers tighter. The pressure, the feeling of being trapped sent lightning over Dean’s body and he groaned, twisting his hands just to feel Cas hold him down tighter. Cas’ breath stuttered and Dean looked up at him, reveling in the wonder and naked want on his face. 

“Fuck, Dean. You love this, don’t you? Love being bound for me.”

Dean nodded, throwing his head back with a whine as Cas leaned forward and kissed his way up Dean’s chest and neck, biting gently and licking before kissing Dean, hot and open mouthed, making Dean melt into the sensations. His cock was valiantly twitching, he was too tired still to get hard again so soon but Cas made it easy to want, to need, to feel...to love. 

After a moment of getting lost in each other, Cas worked his lips over to Dean’s ear and whispered, voice husky. 

“Turn over, sweetheart.”

Feeling weak, too relaxed to coordinate, he let Cas do most of the maneuvering, turning over onto his stomach with a groan. He bunched up the closest pillow, raising his shoulders and neck into a position that took pressure off of his sore muscles. He felt Cas run his hands up and down his back, stopping to knead his gluteal muscles a moment before spreading his cheeks.

Cas moaned and murmured his name, voice reverent as he ran his thumbs up and down his crack, so close to touching. Dean shifted, trying to press into the feeling, to urge Cas to touch but Cas backed off, running his hands back over Dean’s back, palming his softened muscles. 

“Dean, my Dean. So gorgeous, baby.” 

Dean hummed, feeling warm and safe, trusting Cas like he had no other. Cas pressed kisses over the skin of his back before reaching, his hips leaving Dean’s thighs for a moment and then returning. Dean distantly heard the sound of Cas pumping lotion and then his hands were back, softly massaging his lower back and slowly working their way up. Dean let out a loud, scandalous groan. 

“Shit, Cas. A massage? Don’t tell me you can bake a pie, too. I’d have to insist we get married immediately.” 

Cas let out that little giggle, making warmth spread through Dean’s chest. 

“I will give you a massage every night and bake you a pie every weekend if that is what it takes to keep you, Dean.” 

Dean chuckled and then groaned again as Cas started working a sore muscles near his neck. 

“Sounds good to me, Cas. I ain’t that hard to keep happy.”

Cas hummed and kept his hands moving, the pressure just right on Dean’s back and neck, not too hard and not too soft. By the end of it, minutes, hours later, Dean couldn’t tell, all he knew was that he was a worn out puddle, body singing and humming in contentment. Cas pressed a kiss on the back of Dean’s head and ran his nails gently through his hair, making Dean sigh. 

“How does a bath sound, baby?”

“Fuck, yeah, Cas. Bathe me so hard, daddy.”

Cas choked, jostling Dean as he laughed and Dean grinned, keeping his eyes shut, his body relaxed. 

“Not my fetish, Dean.”

“Aw, shucks. That’s okay, Cas. Nobody’s perfect.”

Cas chuckled and kissed Dean’s head again before getting off the bed. Dean stayed where he was, tracking the faint sounds of Cas opening the bathroom door, running the water and opening more than one drawer and cabinet. Dean drifted, dozing on and off until Cas came back and helped him roll out of bed. He swayed on his feet, laughing and leaning on Cas and blinking his eyes in the harsh lights of the bathroom. 

Cas urged him towards the bath but Dean balked, turning to tug at Cas’ loose shirt, the undone top buttons making it hang to one side, almost off his left shoulder. 

“You’re coming in too, right?”

Cas swallowed heavily as Dean kissed his exposed skin and popped the rest of the buttons open. He shrugged off the shirt, helping Dean undress him, kicking his pants off and away once Dean undid the zipper. After they were both naked, Dean took a moment to take Cas in. 

He was so gorgeous, all sharp lines and toned muscles, a runner’s body and the lightest dusting of hair on his chest and stomach. His thighs were tight, slim and they framed his flaccid cock beautifully, balls hanging heavy, making Dean a little light headed. He wanted Cas so much, wanted to worship him every day, keep him close until they were old and dying. His chest squeezed and he kissed Cas chastely on the lips before turning back to the tub. 

The warm water lapped around his hips as he sat down, threatening to overflow. He chuckled and then groaned, leaning back and relaxing into the steaming bath. 

“Man, I don’t do this enough. Feels so good, Cas.”

Cas hummed, giving him a pleased smile and plucked up something off the counter. He held it out on his palm for Dean to see and Dean raised an incredulous eyebrow at the dark blue bath bomb. 

“You carry that in your pocket, Cas?”

Cas rolled his eyes before turning his hand over, dropping it into the water between Dean’s legs. It fizzed as it sank and a pretty blue cloud started to spread. 

“I found it in the back of your hall closet. You deserve more decadence in your life, Dean.”

Dean gave Cas a crooked smile, feeling his cheeks blush, a warmth settling in his chest every time Cas did something to take care of him or made him feel good. Cas crouched down beside the tub, reaching over to grab a washcloth off the counter. He kissed Dean on the temple before pushing him to lay back, dipping the cloth into the water and applying soap to it. 

Dean closed his eyes as Cas washed him, shoulder to fingers, his neck, down his chest and abdomen. He soaked in Cas’ generous touch, like a lizard in the sun, breathing in deep the scent of vanilla and lavender. It didn’t take long for arousal to start building again, a slow simmer that spread over his body and settled in his heart and loins. His body was pleasurably lax, his mind drifting in a cloud and he slit open his eyes just enough to watch Cas as he worked, haloed by the lights above the sink. 

He looked so rumpled and soft like this, worshiping Dean, taking care of him like no one had ever thought to, had never wanted to. Dean was so damn lucky to have met Cas, to have drawn his eye, touched his heart. Fuck, he wanted Cas for more than just tonight. It seemed unlikely that Cas would stick around for very long after he came to really know Dean, know his flaws and his limitations, physical and emotional. He was choking up now, spiraling in his thoughts and he whined, tugging at Cas’ arm. 

“You promised to join me, Sir.”

Cas tsked at him, ringing out the cloth and setting it down before running a wet hand through Dean’s hair. 

“My baby needs me?”

Dean nodded, pushing down the urge to cry, blinking tears from his eyes. Why did this always happen to him? He was so damn needy. 

Cas shushed him, standing up and Dean moved forward in the bath, still tugging on Cas, staring at his half hard cock with wide eyes. Cas hadn’t been kidding, he got off on taking care of Dean like this and some of the dark insecurities floating in his head vanished. Cas liked that he was needy, that he clung to his dom, seeking comfort and reassurance. 

Cas carefully entered the bath, squishing himself behind Dean and gently maneuvering them both until they were comfortable. Dean hummed and leaned back against him, running his palms up and down Cas’ thighs. Cas gathered Dean in his arms and buried his face in Dean’s neck, pressing soft kisses before nipping playfully. Dean pressed back into Cas’ chest, tilting his head to give him more room. 

His cock was hard now, aching in response to the soft caresses. He rocked his hips, closing his eyes, grinding back on the obvious feeling of Cas’ own cock, sitting hot and hard against his lower back. Cas’ breath stuttered and he pressed into Dean, rocking forward, arms around Dean’s chest, holding him close, breath ghosting across Dean’s neck. Their movements were languid and Dean’s arousal stayed at a pleasant simmer, enjoying the way his body fit against Cas’ as they chased completion. 

He came quickly, writhing and grinding as Cas whispered heavenly sentiments into his ear between gentle kisses. 

“So good for me, sweetheart. So beautiful and all mine. Come for me, Dean…” 

Cas followed soon after, palming every inch of Dean, his toned chest, his soft stomach, his open thighs. They stayed in the bath a few moments longer, washing each other and exchanging lazy kisses. After the third time Dean jerked, fighting his exhausted body to stay awake a little longer, to enjoy this moment as long as he could, Cas chuckled and pulled the chain to the drain stopper with his toes. 

“Come on, sweetheart. Let’s get you tucked back into bed and when you wake up, there will be pancakes and coffee waiting.”

Dean let Cas dry him with his fluffiest towel and guide him back to bed. They held each other close and drifted into sleep. 

***

The other side of the bed was empty when Dean woke up and the sun streaming in through the windows highlighted his absence. That empty sight and the coldness of the sheets under his hand caused his chest to constrict with a dark, sad disappointment. He rose out of bed reluctantly and entered the bathroom to brush his teeth, rubbing his sore neck before rolling it a few times. 

Fuck, what had he expected? A man like Cas, so smart, so caring and scorchingly attractive...why would he stick around for someone like Dean? Dean, a college dropout, dealing with chronic depression and more insecurities than he could count. Cas probably took a better look around his house, saw Dean in broad daylight, took a moment to reflect and left in a hurry. 

Pushing back the tears in his eyes, Dean went back into his bedroom, looking around for any sign of last night, that Cas had been here at all. There was nothing, of course, and Dean swallowed thickly at the thought that maybe he had dreamed up everything. He tugged on a pair of sweats and a tee shirt and stood in the middle of the room, running a slow hand through his hair, wishing it were Cas’. 

A loud clatter and a muffled curse startled Dean out of his thoughts, coming from behind the closed bedroom door. Dean frowned, crossing the room in three large steps to grab his phone off the dresser before opening the door wide. The smell of bacon wafted over him and he took a deep breath, hope rising swiftly in his chest as he hurried to the kitchen. 

Cas was there, in only his briefs and Dean bit his lip, hiding a smile as he leaned casually in the doorway, watching with eager eyes the shift of muscle under smooth skin. Cas looked a little overwhelmed as he cooked, stirring scrambled eggs, flipping frying bacon and shoving bread into the toaster. 

He watched Cas fumble with the fancy coffee machine, only the best for Dean’s caffeine addiction, before creeping up and winding his arms around Cas’ waist. He tensed and then went limp, leaning back into Dean’s arms with a sigh, head falling to Dean’s shoulder. Dean buried his face in Cas’ wild, untamed hair and didn’t hold back a smile, pressing it against Cas’ scalp. 

“Good morning, Dean. I had planned to have this done before you woke but I admit I am a little overwhelmed. It has been a long time since I cooked for a partner. I hope you like burnt bacon.”

Cas nudged the tongs at the plate of bacon sitting on the counter with a listless air. Dean chuckled, feeling light with happiness and reached around Cas to snag a piece. He popped it in his mouth and chewed with a loud moan as Cas turned in his arms. Cas rolled his eyes, leaning forward for a kiss, running his tongue over Dean’s lip to taste the grease left behind. Dean hummed, trying to chase Cas’ lips, to steal a few more kisses but Cas laughed, pushing him back to turn back to the stove. 

“Behave, Dean. You need food and I am going to give it to you. So sit down and hydrate for me.”

Dean grinned and pressed a lingering kiss to Cas’ nape, running his hands over his back as he stepped away. 

“Yes, Sir.”

He sat at the kitchen table and reached for the full glass of water, drinking it down quickly. Cas watched him from the corner of his eye as he plated the eggs and toast, looking pleased and smug. 

“Good boy.”

Damn, that deep, gravel tone never failed to make Dean shiver, bumps raising on the back of his neck, gut clenching in hot arousal. Fuck, he wanted to be good for Cas. It felt so right, made him feel so damn wanted and desired. This dynamic, the give and take, the push and surrender was addictive but no one had ever done it for Dean quite like Cas. 

“Looks good, Cas. Love a man that can cook.”

Cas blushed at that and Dean grinned again, feeling like his face was going to crack in two with all the smiling he was doing today. One night, one good night where all of his needs, emotional and physical were met and suddenly the future looked a little brighter. Cas sat across from him at the table and lifted his knife to butter the toast, his lips quirked, giving Dean a shy glance from under his lashes. 

“I am glad to have pleased you, Dean. Now be good for me and open your mouth.”

Dean went still, confused until Cas speared the eggs on his plate with a fork and offered it. Dean obeyed, taking the offering and chewing slowly. No one had ever fed him like this before, he wanted to savor it. 

“That’s it, sweetheart. Look at you being so good for me. How does it taste?”

Dean ducked his head, unable to keep facing Cas’ dark, hooded gaze. It felt like Cas could see through him, to the heart of him with those eyes. Dean felt laid bare but he wasn’t scared, he knew Cas wouldn’t judge him, would only hold him close. He hummed and hooked their ankles together under the table, making Cas smile. 

They ate in silence for a few moments, Cas feeding Dean occasionally, his eyes soaking in every move that Dean made, as if to reassure himself that Dean was real. It was nice, the intense, almost obsessive regard that Cas paid him. 

He felt like the center of Cas’ world and that heady thought made his pulse race in pleasure and anxiety. Maybe he was reading too much into this, into last night. Maybe Cas just wanted to keep this casual, contained to the bedroom and behind closed doors. It was Cas that broke the tension between them, that overhanging fear of the unknown, an uncertain future. He cleared his throat and shifted nervously, snapping Dean out of his head. 

“I do not want to make assumptions, Dean but...I feel like there is something significant between us, a potential for something amazing, something great.”

He trailed off, giving Dean a vulnerable look, falling silent at whatever he saw on Dean’s face. Dean’s breath caught and his heart tried to pound out of his chest. 

“Jesus, Cas. That’s the sweetest fucking thing anyone has ever said to me.”

He reached blindly forward, fumbling for Cas’ hand, reluctant to break their gaze. Cas’ smile was radiant, eyes crinkling endearingly with the smallest hint of tears. He grasped at Dean’s hand like a lifeline, entwining their fingers and squeezing gently. Dean took a deep breath and forced his mind into order, wrestling with his emotions, fighting to push out words that were worthy of Cas. 

“I’m not good at this whole...emotions stuff but...Fuck, Cas. The way you make me feel, it’s-”

He shook his head, feeling helpless, words stuttering. Cas rose from his seat and rounded the table to kneel before him, never breaking the grip their hands had. Dean spread his thighs to make room and sighed, leaning into Cas’ hand when he cupped Dean’s face. His thumb brushed over his cheek, the soft, hypnotizing motion grounding Dean, making his mind go quiet, thoughts slowing to a manageable crawl. 

Cas’ face was understanding and he stayed quiet, patient as Dean closed his eyes for a moment. He felt Cas press a kiss to his brow and opened his eyes again. He was so fucking perfect and Dean couldn’t fuck this up, he couldn’t push this away and forget about it in a day, a week, a year. Cas was it for him, he could feel it deep in his soul, no matter how crazy it sounded or how fast it seemed. 

“Cas, I want this, us, I want you, fuck, everything, I-”

He was trembling now, reaching to grab onto Cas, clutching desperately at his naked biceps. Cas shushed him, eyes so understanding that it made Dean’s heart ache.

“I understand and I feel the same way, sweetheart. You have me, Dean, for as long as you want me.”

Dean huffed, feeling Cas’ arms come around him, holding him tight. He kissed Cas, slow and sweet, lingering as long as he could, breathing in his scent and feeling his warmth. 

“Don’t say that, Cas. I’ll never let you go.” 

Cas touched their foreheads together, eyes damp but glowing with a deep content. 

“I never want you to let me go, baby. Say you will keep me…”

The dream like moment was interrupted by his phone going off, chiming loudly and vibrating against the table. Dean blinked a few times as Cas leaned back so he could grab it, intending to silence it and get back to what was important: Cas. He checked the caller ID and scoffed, rolling his eyes before grinning down at Cas’ raised eyebrow. 

“It’s Garth, the guy I was gonna meet last night at the club. I should…”

Before he could finish, Cas’ expression went blank and he rose, leaning over the table to start gathering their empty plates. He didn’t look at Dean when he spoke. 

“Of course, Dean. I will start cleaning up.”

“Uh, sure, okay…”

Brushing off Cas’ sudden change in attitude and his own unease, Dean went into the living room, swiping to answer the call before it went to voicemail. 

“This is Dean.”

Garth’s voice answered, his words tumbling out of his mouth like rushing water over rocks. 

“Heeey, Dean! Okay, okay, I know you’re probably, like, super mad at me for last night but I swear I have a good excuse! I promise I’m not some mega douche that would stand a guy up-”

Dean laughed, pacing over to the window and looking out at the sedate street, watching the small neighborhood wake up. 

“Whoa, whoa, buddy, slow down. Take a breath, man. I’m not mad at you.”

“Oh, really? I mean, I would totally understand if you were or if you wanted to never speak to me again but I wanted to explain…”

“Dude, seriously, I’m okay. In fact, I, uh, met someone at the club last night.”

Garth gasped loudly.

“What, that’s awesome! Oh, shit, am I interrupting?” 

Dean couldn’t help his grin, listening with half his attention as Cas started washing the dishes in the kitchen. He pressed his head against the cool glass, feeling tranquil. 

“Nah, we were just having breakfast. Cas made it.”

“Cas?”

“Yeah, his name’s Castiel.”

“Whoa, weird name and he stayed for breakfast? Look at you, hot stuff! Hey, wait, I wonder if he knows Gadreel. They both have crazy cool names.”

Dean frowned, shaking his head at Garth’s never ending enthusiasm. 

“Who?”

“Oh, uh, well, last night I got into a car accident. Some drunk guy ran a red light and smashed my car to all hell.”

“Fuck, man. I’m so sorry, why didn’t you call me? I would have come.”

“Well, between the wreck, the jaws of life and the ambulance, I lost my phone. I’m so sorry I didn’t call. I feel like shit for standing you up.”

“Shut up, dude. We’re cool. Are you in the hospital?”

“Nah, they let me go early this morning. But, dude, my man, my bro, the hottest, most earth shatteringly gorgeous EMT rescued me. Like this towering, uniform wearing, handsome ass fucker pulled me from my car. I just wish he had given me mouth to mouth, ya know. Wait, is this awkward?”

Dean laughed loudly, clutching at his phone tightly. He felt relief at hearing Garth’s rambling, glad that the other man wasn’t an ass, glad that maybe out of this he had made a friend. 

“No, Garth. I want to hear all about your sexy EMT so I can tell you all about my sexy college professor.” 

Garth’s laugh was carefree, loud and unapologetic. 

“Nice, well maybe we could do a double date after I charm Gadreel into my bed. I have a three week plan so I’ll keep you posted, okay?”

“Okay, Garth. I gotta go, Cas is waiting. And good luck.” 

He hung up and returned to the kitchen, cursing even those few moments not spent with Cas. Cas was at the sink still, broad back facing Dean and he didn’t hesitate to close the distance between them, hugging him from behind again, hooking his chin over Cas’ shoulder.

Cas tensed up again but this time he didn’t melt into Dean’s embrace. Instead, he kept his posture rigid, movements erratic. Dean frowned and dropped his arms, coming to stand beside Cas, ducking his head to see Cas’ face. His expression was blank, revealing nothing of his mind and Dean bit his lip, voice low and trembling, betraying plainly his hurt. 

“Cas? Did I do something wrong?” 

Cas dropped the plate in his hand with a sigh and they both watched it sink into the water. He closed his eyes and braced himself on the sink, soap suds clinging to his forearms. Something hot and ugly twisted in Dean’s chest and he moved back, meaning to pull away, give Cas some space, heart starting to break, doubts clouding his mind. Cas stopped him before he moved very far, reaching out and grabbing his arm with a firm grip. Dean froze and met Cas’ eyes, refusing to look away, head swimming with confusion and pain. 

“Forgive me, Dean. My behavior has nothing to do with you.”

“Right, the whole ‘it’s not you, it’s me’.”

Dean snorted and pulled his arm, trying to break Cas’ iron hold but Cas moved closer, both hands holding him still now. Dean gave up trying to break free, his shoulders slumping in defeat, preparing for the worst. How had this gone so wrong, so quickly? Where had he fucked up? Cas pursed his lips, frowning and looking frustrated. 

“No, no, Dean, not like that. I suppose I was a little...insecure just now.”

He looked ashamed, face forlorn and raised his hands up to hold Dean’s face, thumbs brushing over his cheekbones. It seemed to soothe Cas as much as Dean. Dean shook his head, feeling lost. 

“You’re saying what, that you were jealous of Garth?” 

Cas sighed and looked to the side, blushing lightly. Dean chuckled and raised his hands, encircling Cas’ wrists with his fingers. The touch made Cas turn back to him, looking cautiously hopeful. 

“I’ll say this once or a hundred times, for the rest of our lives if you need me to, Cas: There is no one else for me but you. No one has ever made me feel the way that you do, I’m half in love with you already. I hope that’s okay?”

Cas’ focus was intense, looking at Dean awestruck before his face went darker, almost feral with a possessive glint in his eyes. One of his hands dropped to Dean’s nape, squeezing and pulling him closer for a head spinning kiss full of more teeth than tongue. His other hand pushed under Dean’s shirt to map every inch of his back, nails digging sporadically, making Dean shake with anticipation of the next harsh bite against his skin. 

Dean whined, pressing closer, letting Cas devour him, wishing he could sink into Cas, make them one entity forever. Cas pulled back, gasping for air right along with Dean, both of them grinning stupidly. 

“You said you were bad at expressing your emotions, sweetheart. That was an amazing first attempt.”

Dean shrugged, blushing under the praise and the tender look in Cas’ eyes. 

“You make it easy, Cas. You make me want to be better at this whole relationship thing. I’d hate to lose you. I’d like to keep you, always.”

The look on Cas’ face was nothing short of transcendent and he took Dean’s wrists in his hands, pressing kisses to the faint red line on each one before nibbling softly, keeping Dean’s gaze. Dean moaned low at the feeling, at the reminder of Cas’ tie holding him still, the delicious tug of the silk when he moved. 

He missed the feel of it with a soul deep ache and Cas seemed to sense it because his long fingers circled around his wrists, holding him in a firm grip. Dean bit his lip as Cas smirked at him, smug and pleased and so damn sexy that Dean felt like he had been set on fire with how much he burned for Cas’ everything; his touch, his smile, his lips, his hands, his dominance, his love. 

“If you are mine, then I am yours, Dean. Maybe we need something to remind us of that.”

Dean cleared his throat, forcing his eyes up from their hands. 

“What did you have in mind, Sir?”

“I could buy you a nice set of wrist cuffs? Or...a collar? You could wear a collar at home for me, whenever you wanted to or the cuffs, around your beautiful, delicate wrists, under your shirt while I’m at work. That way, you will always feel me, Dean. You can look at them, feel them against your skin and know that no matter how far apart we are, that you will always belong to me, you will always be mine.” 

Dean groaned and pressed close to Cas, hiding his face in his neck, feeling flayed open, vulnerable, heart bursting with love and hope. 

“Fuck, Sir, you’re gonna kill me, talking like that.”

“No, my Dean. I’m going to take care of you from now on. Keep you forever and never let you go.”

Cas chuckled and pushed Dean back, smiling wickedly before pressing gentle kisses to his forehead and each eyelid. Dean took in a deep, shaking breath, loving the feel of Cas’ hands on him, feeling safe, wanted, surrounded and completely cherished.

**Author's Note:**

> [my tumblr, come chat](https://havok2cat.tumblr.com)


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